It honestly has been a while, but since ive been put in this mood i might as well say something.
IDK why people do what they do, say what they say, or just hate for whatever reason. What i cannot stand is the fact that people can assume something about someone and act like they know you. My life hasn’t been easy. I never got what i really wanted. People see me as a spoiled kid that got whatever i wanted from my mom. Acted cool like i didn’t give a fuck. a kid knows that he can get away with anything because he has his mom. A kid that doesn’t charish what he has or know how lucky he really is. No.. theres a story behind that.. you cant just assume something about somebody .
Lets just say growing up for me was never a great experience. Im not a typical kid that grew up and been raised by their mom n dad. Not saying that im the only person. My mother and dad divorced when i was 3. At that time i had no idea what was going on. Growing up i really never understood why my father was never around… until mom told me when i was around 10 or 11. I remember maybe months after she told me that. There was this one night when i couldn’t sleep. i stayed up till 3 crying. Faced depression for over a year and had therapy sessions. Till now im still not normal. I grew up and realized i cant just sit there.. be that sad weak kid that cant move on and face life. Honestly life not easy and its too short to be wasting your time crying. One thing that i wish i had outta anything is a family. I Want to understand what having a family feels like. Nothing has ever felt complete about my life. Ive never had dinner once with my mother ,father, aunt,uncle, and sister together before. I feel like everything about my life is incomplete. Everything is seperated. My mother been everything to me. She gave up her life to take care of me. As a single mother it wasn’t easy and i am truly blessed to have such a great understanding mother. It wasn’t easy for me either. I Could never accept the fact that the only person taking care of me is my mother. The reason why she spoils me or give me money is because she knows it will buy time. It will distract me from being sad. It kept me out the house. It kept me from thinking like this. She knows giving me money was a risk. She knew what i could of done with money.. become a fuck up , deal drugs,etc but i know better. I’m not saying i haven’t spent money on drugs before, i’m not saying i was perfect with money. Some kids used me for my money. Now that i’m a little bit older me spending my mom’s money hurts me. So instead i got a job to take care of myself. I guess i just grew up. Faced the hard part of life when i was young. The worst part is knowing that i’m still young and when i get older it only gets harder. I realized during this stage i acted different i guess i was really trying to figure out who i really was. One thing i really appreciate about my life is the fact that i really matured,became more wise. I’m happy all of this hit me at a young age. I’m smarter now. I just wish people can understand that having a nice car, getting what you want doesn’t necessary means your living the “good life”. People don’t think i appreciate my mother, people think that i don’t appreciate what i have in general. I’m blessed to be living the life that i have. I’m really not asking for anything … all i’m really asking for is don’t assume something about somebody until you really know their story.
